The What-If Express

One of the Animation Series I love watching is Veggie Tales. It is about limbless fruits and vegetables retelling Bible stories and life lessons. If you are not into Bible stories and life lessons, you will still love it for the silly songs, interesting plots and humor filled dialogues. I recently watched an episode titled “It’s a Meaningful Life”. It is a Christmas themed story focusing on Stewart (Larry the Cucumber). Stewart is happy with his life but a thought always troubles his mind as to what a better life it could have been only if he had caught a football in his past. And then he gets a ticket to the What-If Express.  What-If Express is a train which shows you how life could have been if it had taken a different route – in the case of Stewart if he had caught the football. At the end of the train journey, Stewart must decide – stick to the life he already has or shift to the version which he regrets not having. Unsurprisingly – based on what he sees in his simulated What-If life - Stewart chooses his current life.

 Why?

 We all go through phases in life where we feel that life could have been much better only if we had taken a different decision or only if someone else had done something different or only if things had worked out differently in some way. Most often this decision or circumstance would be way back in the past. When we sulk and think about how great and awesome our life could have been only if things happened differently in the past, then it is time to get a Golden ticket to the What-If Express ourselves. What if you had taken a different decision. What if someone else acted differently. What if the circumstances were different.

 In the parallel track of our What-If life, we will find that the situations we face will be different. The people in our life would be different. The same people who behave one way in one track will behave differently in the other track. As the train moves on, we will realize that the What-If life is not that great. In fact, in most cases it would be much worse.

 By thinking about the infinite possibilities our life could have turned out to be, we miss out on the finer aspects of our current life. We miss out on our current happiness by focusing on our What-If happiness. We miss out on our current relationships by focusing on our What-If relationships. We miss the joy of paving our way through our current career by focusing on our What-If career. As Stewart realizes at the end of his journey, instead of sulking about our What-If life, it is better to enjoy the life we live and be grateful. It is a meaningful life – just the way it is.

 Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Metamorphosis

I bought a Live Butterfly Kit for my 4 year old daughter so that she can learn and visualize the different life stages of a butterfly. The package came with a cup with 5 live caterpillars (with ample air and food supply inside the cup) and a kit to move them around as they transitioned through the different stages. My daughter was wondering “Where are the butterflies?” because there was none inside the package. During the course of 2 weeks, she learned a lot about how nature transforms caterpillars to beautiful butterflies. It also taught me about our own transformations in life. Our transformations are not always visible to the naked eye but reflects in the way we behave and interact with our ecosystem. Join me in one of the transformation journeys.

1. Munching On

During the initial days, all we could see were 5 caterpillars in a cup doing 3 things – eating, eating and eating. They were always munching on the brown solid food at the base of the cup. They were growing in size each day (or each hour). As they kept eating and kept growing, a 4 year old had the obvious question “Why are they always eating?”

During the early months of my career, I was not assigned to any customer project but only to internal projects. I was doing 3 main tasks each day – learn, learn and learn. I kept learning about new programming concepts, new programming languages and tried solving new challenges. Some learning was voluntary and some was forced by the organization I was working for. After a while, with no real exposure to an actual customer project, I asked my manager “Why am I always learning but not actively using the learning anywhere?”

The caterpillars were gathering the needs for what is required later in their life. But for someone not aware of the future, the eating and growing in size does not make much sense. Similarly, I did not know why I was learning so much early in my career. But I learnt much later that none of the learning was going waste in the future. All I was doing was preparing for my future career and projects. Every concept I learnt was put to use in some implementation or other.

Sometimes, we put in a lot of effort without really understanding why and our view of the future might be limited. From my experience, I can assure you that any learning you do is going to help in some way or the other in the future.

2. Dormant

After a few days, the now huge caterpillars moved gently to the inside part of the lid and started to hang. They started forming a J shape and became completely dormant. Soon the color and texture changed and they became completely still. At this point, any 4 year old would have the question “What happened? Are the caterpillars dead?”

In our careers, we go through “still” phases which leaves you and others wondering “What is happening?”. During this dormant phase, we may not be visible to the outside world as we curl and form a J. But deep inside, there is a transformation happening. A transformation which utilizes all the energy captured during the earlier active phase.

During this phase, the chrysalides were also relocated from the cup to a more spacious net basket. Even in our lives, we are thrown around to a different location and we struggle to find an immediate purpose behind the actions. We do realize later that it all makes sense.

After a 4 year old realizes that a butterfly is going to emerge out of the chrysalis, the obvious question every morning for the next few days was “Where are the butterflies?”. The answer, again obviously, was that we need to be patient. Blaine Pascal said “All of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room alone.”. It is tough for human beings to be dormant and alone. We crave for attention and the need to be “visible”. The human mind is a wonderful but dangerous thing. The only thing which will take us through this dormant phase is patience and the realization that something beautiful is coming up in the future.

3. Bright and ready to fly

Finally, the butterflies emerged. They were beautiful and colorful. And they had a new skill – they could fly. Looking back at the earlier phases – caterpillar and chrysalis – it is tough to believe the transformation. But the earlier phases were essential to the beauty and skill visible in the current phase. We released the butterflies from our balcony. They were hesitant to leave initially – maybe they were getting used to the oranges slices we were feeding them daily. But ultimately, they took the courage to fly into the beautiful vast world to start a new life on their own.

Often people look at the current success (or lack of it) of a person without knowledge of what the person had to go through in the past. Or people look at the current munching or dormant phase of a person without an idea or vision of the beautiful future. We need to remember to look at a career of a person as a whole without looking at the bits and pieces to get an idea of the bigger picture.

I am not sure what phase you are in your metamorphosis journey. Whatever be the phase, always remember that the key words are learning, patience and courage. They will allow you to fly high.

The Other Side

“Are we there yet?” – the question on everyone’s mind. Is the worst phase of the pandemic over? Can we restart whatever we can restart? What would “normal” life look like as we come out of the situation? There is no concrete answer for any of the questions at this point of time. Different

countries are at different phases of reopening. Even within countries, different states or regions are in different phases. Everyone is an expert and has an idea on how things should be but the hard reality is that no one really knows what’s next.

During the month of February this year, I remember viewing a video from our colleagues in China showcasing how they are dealing with the virus and the lockdown. I admired the strength and positivity reflected by everyone in the video. Little did we know that the whole world will be in the same situation just a month or two later. The same strength and positivity was required from everyone. The first casualty in any crisis is common sense. If a crisis of a global scale hits us, common sense just seems to disappear – as evident in the disappearance of toilet papers in the stores.

The initial days were a struggle since no one was prepared for this. The daily news kept a tally of the body count. But after a while, it did not make sense. Each human life is precious. Every person who lost his/her life was a father/mother, son/daughter, grandpa/grandma, friend to someone – and to that someone, it is a irreplaceable loss. We have no reason to pat ourselves in our back even if it is proved that the number of deaths could have been higher and we managed to keep it at a lower number. Every life lost is precious. To make things worse, if that is even possible, a few people tried to earn money and fame at the cost of people who were already suffering. I do hope that there is a special place in hell for these self-centered individuals.

Gradually, people tried to see some positivity even in the middle of the pandemic. Not tracking the daily news helps to improve the mood. But what also helps is the great stories we hear every day. We found new heroes in doctors and nurses working super hard to save lives. The humble grocery store workers were putting themselves at risk to ensure that we get the stuff we need. Many donated generously whatever they could for people in need. Teachers put in their best effort to ensure that the kids get the education they need. Virtual get-togethers became the norm. I personally talked to my college classmates after 20 years and my ex-colleagues after 4 years – it makes me wonder why we did not do it before. All the positive stories we heard made us believe that there is still good in the world.

I recently saw a photo taken by Voyager 1 as it sped out of the Solar System 30 years back. Earth was nothing but a “Pale Blue Dot”. It gives a perspective of where we actually are - this is the only place we call home. There is no where else to go – even if we settle somewhere else, I am sure we will take our unwanted baggage of problematic human nature with us. In any sense, we are all in this together. We need hope and a lot of love. A hope that we learn from this experience and turn out to be better individuals. A hope that we are better prepared to handle a crisis in the future and better still, avoid one. A hope that the world will be a better place for future generations and a hope that the current generation will work towards it. A hope that love prevails – love towards every single individual. Love towards all neighbors – near and far – because we are all nothing but neighbors. Hope and Love – all that is needed to take us through this crisis to the other side. And to keep us there.

God – in times of a pandemic

I am not a religious person nor am I a person well-versed in the scriptures. I am just a fellow human being sharing my thoughts with fellow human beings. Not with an intention of swaying your thoughts towards God or away from Him, but to make your own choice.

I have been truly blessed by God in my life. Blessed beyond what I am worthy of. Blessed beyond what I have thanked Him for. There are portions of my life where I felt in control. There are portions of my life where I felt someone else was in control. There are portions of my life where I never understood why things happened the way they happened. And I still don’t understand. But I always felt and knew that He was in control of my life. He had a plan and He knew what He was doing. I tried to understand the plan but failed miserably. Then I realized that I should not even try. Whether I do my part in the plan or not, He always executes His plan. He knows the number of hairs on my head (which is decreasing by the way) but at the same time I am just a small little speck when compared to His mighty power. I always saw God as mighty but compassionate at the same time.

I never thought I will be in the middle of a pandemic in my lifetime. That was not my plan. But here I am. All round me, I see panic and more panic. In the midst of it all, people (not all) are turning towards God. A few religious leaders are trying to cash in on the fear of people. Some others are trying to explain things in a manner of “I told you so” – quoting the scriptures or even worse, quoting their own vague statements from the past. They claim that they understand God’s plan and also the next steps which need to be done by human beings. My stupid brain cannot understand most of the things which are being said. I am still stuck in the question as to why a mighty and compassionate God brought such confusion and suffering to human beings. Is it because of the sin being so rampant in the world? Is it because men forgot God? The answer is simple – I do not know.

I do know – based on my life – that He does not need man’s help to implement His plan. Any man proclaiming that he can do something to change God’s plan and making a name or money out of it is just reserving a place in hell for himself. At this point of time, we do not have to squeeze our brain to understand God’s plan. All we have to do is to do our part. Whether it is by directly helping people who are suffering or by sitting at home and seeking His amazing grace – we all have to do our part. Help your family – near and far. Help your neighbors – known and unknown. Most importantly, never forget that God is in control. We will not understand what is happening – we don’t have to. God has a plan and He is mighty and compassionate.

Take Rest

I started my career in 2000. In those days, you leave work when you leave office. Laptops were reserved for the management team and developers had to work on computers with bulky monitors and CPU units. Work from home was not an option. Even if it had been, we had to hire movers and packers just to take our computer home. Mobile phones were not prevalent – they were bulky, had actual physical keys and you had to pay for incoming calls. The point is that you left work at the office – even if you left office late because of work. Once you are out of the building, you are out of your work clothes. Work did not follow us in a back pack or a small device with a touch screen.

We still found it tough to go on vacations. We were humble developers in an organization which had thousands of the same breed. But we felt important and a feeling that the organization and it’s customers will come to a standstill if we log off for a long time. The mind was always switched on to work.

Technological advances and the era of connectivity has made the situation worse. Enough has been said and written and preached about it. I believe that out of office replies were invented so that people feel bad as they go about setting it.

We work hard so that we can rest later. But “later” never comes till one enters eternal bodily rest. Needless to say, it is just good to switch off from work and get some rest. Everything will work just as fine without you. The organization will continue to exist. Customers will continue to complain. Old issues will get resolved and new issues will come into existence. As they say “life will go on”. To think that you have to carry the burden of the organization or the nation’s economy or the future of the Earth on your mighty shoulders without taking rest is a myth. And it is a myth which exists in every person’s mind. Take time off. Chill and take rest. You will find that some of the issues which were troubling your mind will no longer exist when you switch back on. If your mind is in the right place, you will achieve more in your sleep than in your waking hours.

And the right place is the feet of God. Place all your burdens on His feet and take some rest. Being awake and anxious is not going to help beyond a certain point. The God who gives rest will fix everything while you are sleeping.

“It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for he gives to his beloved sleep” – Psalm 127:2

Wisdom brightens the face

I started my career 19 years back. The only meetings I remember attending were monthly team meetings. Once in a while, we had an ad-hoc meeting called by our manager to figure out whether we were wearing shoes and whether our shirts were tucked in (the ideal team to start a career). But otherwise, we focused a lot of our energy in developing code. We regularly had one on one discussions among peers and the discussions were limited to the topic in hand - “Should I right align this control or left align?” or “Should I validate in the front end or backend?”.

I am sure everyone starts their career in an environment where there are few meetings. But meetings become part of life sooner than later. At some point, we reach a phase where we have 2 or 3 meetings at the same time in our calendar. Articles and even books have been written on the topic of meetings. Everyone knows that inefficient meetings take up a lot of productive time but very few have practically implemented any solution. I am not dreaming of providing a solution for the meeting headaches – simply because I do not have a solution.

Recently I was at an internal event and there were multiple sessions throughout the day. I was just a participant and tried to learn as much as possible from the sessions. Attending a specific session was optional and you can choose the topic of interest to attend. I was attending a session along with a small crowd which can be fed by 2 pizzas quite comfortably. As usual, the highly interested group was in the front rows, the slightly interested group was in the middle rows (I parked myself here) and I-just-need-a-chair-to-sit-in-dim-light sleepy crowd was at the back. 10 minutes into the meeting, the presenter decided to pause to take questions from the audience and I think he will regret this decision for the next 15 minutes.

I have been a presenter in multiple events – within my organization and outside. I have also conducted training to a diverse group of audience – from pure technical topics to functional topics to somewhere-in-the-middle topics like Design Thinking. Handling a diverse audience is a challenge – especially if the diversity is spread across multiple parameters like professional experience, levels of interest, number of emails to check etc. But there is always a person who attends a session or presentation to question the presenter or the idea presented by the presenter. That person will try to prove that he is not only smarter than the presenter but also the entire Executive Board of the company he/she is working in.

The session I was in had one such attendee. He questioned everything the presenter had just discussed and literally questioned the whole strategy of the unit we were in (he was in the same unit). But what struck me most was the poise and grace with which the presenter handled the situation. I am not sure whether I would have maintained my poise because I was fuming even though I was just sitting and listening. The person asking the “questions” was hell bent on proving that he is smarter than half the world. The presenter just stuck to the facts and at no point became personal or lost his cool. The exchange lasted 15 minutes but it felt like forever. Finally, the attendee had to agree to move on – much to the agreement of the rest of the people in the room.

The one thing I learnt during the session was not in the slide deck of the presenter. It was in the way the presenter handled the situation with the “smart guy”. I hope I will be at least half as good as that presenter when faced with a similar situation. Sometimes we learn the right lessons at the wrong place.

“Who is like the wise? Who knows the explanation of things ? A person’s wisdom brightens their face and changes its hard appearance” – Ecclesiastes 8:1

Parking in circles

Parallel parking is a challenge which “drives” people crazy. A few cars have the ability to park on their own. But only a few own the few cars. I am not one of them. The last time I parallel parked a car was for my driving license test. I have never done it after I received my license. It makes me wonder why it is being tested in the first place. 

Nevertheless, car parking is an adventure by itself. If you are travelling to a big city for work or sightseeing, you are bound to face difficulties in finding a parking slot. Our forefathers did not see any reason to provision for parking space when they built the big cities. They didn’t have cars back then but they should have still planned for it – they are called “forefathers” for no simple reason. But innovation has led us to multi-level car parks. If you sit back and think, the very idea of parking a car in a multi-storey building sounds funny. Which statement makes sense – “I stay in the 7^th floor” or “I park my car in the 7^th floor”? Basements are for cars, not the upper floors. But multi-level car parking exists, and we  use them.

We recently decided to enjoy the wonderful flowers at the Philadelphia Flower Show. There are multiple parking options near the Philadelphia Convention Center. But to be safe, I decided to book a parking slot in advance. If you sit back and think, the very idea of booking a car parking slot in advance sounds funny. Which statement makes sense – “I booked a flight ticket in advance” or “I booked a car parking slot in advance”? Nevertheless, I was confirmed a slot and it gave me peace of mind. When I reached the building, I was half expecting someone to hold a placard reading “Welcome Santosh”. There was no one – just a gate with a place to scan my proof of booking. It was a challenge getting the bar code beneath the scanner – someone with a funny bone must have designed the scanner. The only option was to get down from the car and place the bar code beneath the scanner – always a tricky thing to do when you the car is standing in an upward incline. Forgetting to activate the parking brake could be costly.

The interesting part came next - the round and round way to find a parking slot. For every floor where there was no parking slot, you have to drive through a narrow spiral taking you to the next level. This tests your driving skills and this should be part of a driving license test. Of course, to save space the spiral will be as narrow as possible. I expected a parking slot to be reserved in my name. But I had to find my own slot. In some cases, you see the reverse light in a parked car on and you stop for the parked car to leave the slot. Of course, the parked car will take its own sweet time to exit resulting in a traffic jam. If you sit back and think, the very idea of a traffic jam inside a building sounds funny. Which statement makes sense – “I was stuck in a traffic jam near the city center” or “I was stuck in a traffic jam in the second floor of the car park”. Anyways, I did park my car and we had a fabulous time at the flower show.

Recently, I had to park my car at a railway station and catch a train. I was again going in circles in the parking area – this time on a flat surface. However early I reach the parking area, there are always “other people” before me who take up all the parking slots. If I reach by 6:10 AM, the “other people” are there by 6:05 AM. If I reach by 6:05 AM, the “other people” are there by 6 AM. I was so frustrated going in circles in search of a spot that I was about to go back home and skip office. If you sit back and think, the very idea of missing office because of no parking space sounds funny. Which statement makes sense – “I missed office because I was very sick” or “I missed office because I couldn’t find a parking space for my car”? Nevertheless, I was able to park and go to office that day.

The real challenge in driving a car is not parking the car but finding a space to park it. The driving license test should test someone’s skill to find a free slot instead of focusing on parallel parking. I am sure you will agree.

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